Carlin is usually spot on. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care about you until you reach military age. I HAVEN'T DETERMINED THAT YET. 4 0 obj George Carlin was born and raised in Manhattan, New York in 1937 and died in Santa Monica, California in 2008. Not in the abstract they don't. See they dont READ they REVIEW, they dont have OPINIONS they take POSITIONS, and they dont give ADVISE they make RECOMMENDATIONS. George Carlin - National Press Club May 19, 1999. It will be a lot of fun. From his 1992 (first ever LIVE) HBO TV special "Jammin' in New York", performed in from of 6,500 people at Madison Square Gardens. Well, we know what they want. But here's the thing: you don't need social media to be happy. All across this great land of ours, the greatest nation on earth, the greatest nation in the history of the World and in times of military crisis you can be sure that someone in a suit in this town will eventually plant himself in front of a camera and carry on a great deal about the most powerful nation on the face of the earth. 0000003901 00000 n GEORGE CARLIN: I want to tell you something about words that I think is important. The planet is fine. The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. [5], Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. Lee did not involve himself formally in politics, but he was a symbol of diversity and the synthesis of "East" and "West." People trying to make the world save for their Volvos. (LAUGHS). I dont vote. Its almost a poetic rap. Video Transcript - In Defense of Politicians (George Carlin, 1996) "Now there's one thing you mighta noticed I don't complain about: politicians. THOU SHALT NOT BEAR FALSE WITNESS . And theyre elected by American citizens. We haven't learned how to care for one another, we're gonna save the fucking planet? On Election Day, I stay home. But really, they're just regurgitating whatever they heard on cable news or read on some clickbait website. Look them in the eye, shake their hand, and share your thoughts and feelings in person. Shut the fuck up! Did you ever think about the arithmetic? So I have solved this little political dilemma for myself in a very simple way: on election-day, I-STAY-HOME. Fuck em. 188 0 obj Maybe two hundred thousand? I recall many years ago, when he was guest-hosting the Tonight show, George Carlin having a somewhat strained political conversation with the comedian Shelley Winters. He is mostly non-political except for his involvement with the environmental organization, Greenpeace. Our country is failing because the majority of the people are selfish. In April 2004, he placed second on the Comedy Central list of "Top 10 Comedians of US Audiences".The first of Carlin's 14 stand-up comedy specials for HBO was filmed in 1977. "George Carlin" Scripts.com. Everybody complains about politicians. "Political correctness is America's newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. Then watch the video. So, next time you're scrolling through your feeds, ask yourself: 'Is this really connecting me with people, or is it just making me more disconnected and isolated?' 0000005590 00000 n "No child left behind. It goes WAY beyond his famous Seven Words You Cant Say on Television (also classic). And secondly, I dont vote cause I believe if you vote, you have no right to complain. If it's a really serious matter, they make a JUDGMENT: POLITICIAN: I HAVEN'T MADE A JUDGMENT ON THAT. Do you think its possible that one of these POLITICIANS whose judgment is so poor that he honestly thinks of himself as serving the Nation might occasionally be expected to indulge in little patriotism huh What do you think? We're not rats', Rectorial address, Glasgow University - 1972, For Geoffrey Tozer: 'I have to say we all let him down', by Paul Keating - 2009, for James Baldwin: 'Jimmy. George Carlin: I'm in Hollywood, Los Angeles. They want obedient workers. George Carlin: Dumb Americans. xWnF}WDh%&^6F%&T{84e[A0@-3wUr-*l:, XF{HT+T0?LL q8"y1yY0LV"vQ|8:GwPBr,&]Qt7oz5n Oh boy. e d u / e t d)/Rect[230.8867 233.3227 416.9463 245.0414]/StructParent 4/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Then, as the controversy continues to heat up, he moves to his next level of complaint: POLITICIAN:THE WHOLE THING HAS BEEN BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION. It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. Subreddit to discuss about ChatGPT. Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin's routine about social media: "Social media. m o n t c l a i r . The planet has been through a lot worse than us. FUCK THEM. But hey, I guess it's just part of my glamorous jet-setting lifestyle.'. 0000002565 00000 n Marc Allan: Hi. POLITICIAN:I'M IN PUBLIC SERVICE, I LIKE AMERICA DON'T YOU? Theyll get it. 183 0 obj <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[466.2109 650.625 540.0 669.375]/StructParent 2/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Another favorite distortion is Public Service. As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you. 0000003516 00000 n Clearly he's preparing us for something (LAUGHS). 184 0 obj 0000000716 00000 n The Wealthy the REAL owners! I think what we really need more of is ritual suicide, you know. And you don't want to spend your real life chasing after digital validation.". They come from American parents, American families, American homes, American schools, American churches, American businesses, American universities, and theyre elected by American citizens. I dont vote. They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? They got you by the balls. From people in all walks of life usually the person in question who has committed some unspeakable act. But that would be much too direct! Maher is a liberal who has endorsed at least the last two Democratic presidential candidates. Everybodys at the mall, scratchin his ass, pickin his nose, takin his credit card out of his fanny pack and buyin a pair of sneakers with lights in them. Not on some social media platform where everyone's shouting into the void.". Hendra, a writer and comedian, talks with Rebecca . Before his death in June 2008, comedian George Carlin spent 10 years working on a memoir, Last Words, with his longtime friend Tony Hendra. Tired of that shit. Vodafone Ad. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. hb```b``na` cc`ahd`phQD"#. -{- f1^u0`cp@&CUoM;v> It's a psychologically satisfying number: the top ten; the ten most wanted; the ten best-dressed. endobj George Carlins daughter, @kelly_carlin, on her first radio show with guest Paul Provenza, talking about this routine. Dog, Cat, Thinking. Now you can just hide behind a screen and fire off your misspelled, grammatically incorrect rants to thousands of strangers. This is not good work. So let me tell you something. Most are only interested in self pleasures and bad habits. But a comedian has the ability to use their anger and intelligence to refocus and reconstruct their pain into entertainment. It has to be the WHOLE THING. 190 0 obj Everybody's going to save something now. Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Social media, huh? While breaking down these claims on political correctness, Carlin implements his own set of values. 0000015151 00000 n If you have selfish, ignorant citizensif you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre gunna get selfish, ignorant leaders. The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. Watch on George Carlin: 'Politicians don't actually say things, they INDICATE them', National Press Club - 1999 Transcribed part of speech begins at 10.33 13 May 1999, National Press Club, Washington DC, USA This is an incomplete transcript made by Raven Developers. 0000001596 00000 n But just as pressure and heat transform coal into diamonds, it's that frustration, social pressure and the heat of anger that transforms us into comedians. Two is all you need, folks. Do you? Everybody says they suck. Maybe you'll find some of the features useful , Ignore this comment if your post doesn't have a prompt. I'm so interesting, I'm so important!'. You know what they want? In fact, it might be the thing that's making you unhappy. I dont always agree with everything he says, but I always listen. )'B^E_2yKg&. Where you calling from today? Well where do people think these politicians come from? And term-limits aint going to do you any good. Not affiliated with OpenAI. 189 0 obj George Carlin Discusses 'Silly Putty and Napalm' Aired June 08, 2001 - 21:00 ET. The table is tilted folks. << /Length 5 0 R /Filter /FlateDecode >> It's like a sewer of hate and stupidity. 183 21 Sure, here's a sample transcript of George Carlin talking about social media in one of his stand-up routines: "Let's talk about social media for a minute. Its called the American Dream,because you have to be asleep to believe it. 192 0 obj 0000002803 00000 n He was known for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and taboo subjects. That's why we need people who can make the TOUGH DECISIONS. They're your followers. Obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. (CLAPS, LAUGHS). 0000001936 00000 n We dont have people like that in this country. It's so obvious that it almost goes without saying, but comedians are generally more intelligent and sensitive than the average person. This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. Everybody says they suck. 0000000016 00000 n Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. %PDF-1.7 % The fact that Americans will probably remain willfully ignorant of the big red, white and blue dick thats being jammed up their assholes everyday, because the owners of this country know the truth. Speakola is a labour of love and Id be very grateful if you would share, tweet or like it. It was during the waning of the Nixon years, where confidence in government was beginning its slide down to the Stygian depths where it rests today; the Vietnam War, and racial unrest, continued to rage on. And it's not just that social media is a distraction from real life, it's also a way of creating a false sense of connection. George Carlin on why he likes disasters and people under pressure, and why the planet is doin' just fine. He was also known for his outspoken views on government and politics. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. It's like they're part of some kind of digital echo chamber. Ive read it dozens of times. You can't have an opinion anymore without being labeled as something. It's just a curated version of ourselves that we want to present to the world. they're always PROCEEDING or moving forward. His satirical comments and relentless attacking a damaged system that unfairly trounced on the rights of its . Notify me of follow-up comments by email. And American English is loaded with euphemisms. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( \n h t t p s : / / d i g i t a l c o m m o n s . You don't. You have no choice. Here's a transcript of a segment where he talks about it: "Social media, what a crock of shit that is. What? 160 Copy quote. WHEN THE HEARINGS HAVE CONCLUDED, I WILL MAKE A JUDGMENT OR I MIGHT MAKE AN ASSESSMENT. Because the owners, the owners of this country dont want that. %%EOF Trump Follower? You crowned us', by Toni Morrison - 1988, for Michael Gordon: '13 days ago my Dads big, beautiful, generous heart suddenly stopped beating', by Scott and Sarah Gordon - 2018, Tara Westover: 'Your avatar isn't real, it isn't terribly far from a lie', The Un-Instagrammable Self, Northeastern University - 2019, Tim Minchin: 'Being an artist requires massive reserves of self-belief', WAAPA - 2019, Atul Gawande: 'Curiosity and What Equality Really Means', UCLA Medical School - 2018, Abby Wambach: 'We are the wolves', Barnard College - 2018, Eric Idle: 'America is 300 million people all walking in the same direction, singing 'I Did It My Way'', Whitman College - 2013, Shirley Chisholm: ;America has gone to sleep', Greenfield High School - 1983, Joe Marler: 'Get back on the horse', Harlequins v Bath pre game interview - 2019, Ray Lewis : 'The greatest pain of my life is the reason I'm standing here today', 52 Cards -, Mel Jones: 'If she was Bradman on the field, she was definitely Keith Miller off the field', Betty Wilson's induction into Australian Cricket Hall of Fame - 2017, Jeff Thomson: 'Its all those people that help you as kids', Hall of Fame - 2016, Dan Angelucci: 'The Best (Best Man) Speech of all time', for Don and Katherine - 2019, Hallerman Sisters: 'Oh sister now we have to let you gooooo!' No contest. Its never going to get any better, dont look for it, be happy with what youve got. But social media is just a symptom of our narcissistic, attention-deficit culture. I show how there is no direct way to escape politicizing . Theres a reason for this, theres a reason education SUCKS, and its the same reason it will never, ever, EVER be fixed. George Carlin: How you doing? Isnt it a bit ironic, though, that the audience is laughing at all this when, essentially, Carlin is saying to them, directly to their faces, that they are stupid? He was a frequent performer and guest host on The Tonight Show during the three-decade Johnny Carson era, and hosted the first episode of Saturday Night Live in 1975. Search. A friend is someone who will come over and help you move. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); All photographs on this website (unless otherwise indicated) were created by and are the property of Daniel R. Joder and may not be used for any purpose without permission. So I know that a little later on this year, youre going to have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much. It's always the whole thing. 191 0 obj [5] And another one: Its what our system produces: Garbage in. George Carlin. Everybody complains about politicians. I'M SERVING THE NATION. And don't even get me started on Twitter. I'm tired of fucking Earth Day, I'm tired of these self-righteous environmentalists, these white, bourgeois liberals who think the only thing wrong with this country is there aren't enough bicycle paths. OR: I WAS QUOTED OUT OF CONTEXT. And the problem is, we're comparing our real lives to other people's highlight reels. People like to twist that around, I know. Certainly! If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. Unless we think of some way to fight back. Let's get started! They don't fall out of the sky. We invite you and ask you to help us update this wiki by editing it. (LAUGHS). They don't fall out of the sky. ', And let's not forget the humblebrags. Likethe public. POLITICIAN:WERE ADDRESSING THE PROBLEM AND WE'LL SOON BE PROCEEDING. (LAUGHS). (BEGIN VIDEO CLIP) GEORGE CARLIN, COMEDIAN: Takes the cake! People go on there, they play with the animals, they pet them, they feed them, but they don't get any real interaction. Look, I'm not against technology or communication. Good honest hard-working people; white collar, blue collar it doesnt matter what color shirt you have on. If you vote, and you elect dishonest, incompetent people, and they get into office and screw everything up, well you are responsible for what they have done, YOU caused the problem, you voted them in, you have no right to complain. He said: [There was] a lot of classroom freedomin fact there was so much freedom that by eighth grade, many of us had lost the faith. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. You and I are not in the big club. They dont want that! And let's not forget about YouTube. The planet has been here four and a half billion years. It's so obvious that it almost goes without saying, but comedians are generally more intelligent and sensitive than the average person. Maybe something else sucks around here. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. I mean, have you ever looked at people's Facebook or Instagram profiles? When they're in trouble, their explanations usually begin simply with words like MISS-COMMUNICATION; QUESTION:WHAT DID YOU DO WRONG, SENATOR?POLITICIAN:WELL, IT WAS A MISS-COMMUNICATION. Add in a bit of effective protest and it might even turn a bit faster.). Besides, there is nothing wrong with the planet. Im sure as soon as the election is over, your country will improve immediately. All day long beating you over the head with their media telling you what to believe, what to think and what to buy. To learn more, check out our transcription guide or visit our transcribers forum, Comedian George Carlins take on The Ten Commandments. I mean, why do we need to see some idiot eating Tide pods or jumping off a roof into a pool? I always thought it was kind of funny and someone out of character for a POLITICIAN to go out of his way to point out the low level of American intelligence (LAUGHS), when indeed his very job depends upon it. (LAUGHS) And we know this must be true because the next thing we hear from him is: POLITICIAN:I JUST WANNA PUT THIS THING BEHIND ME AND GET ON WITH MY LIFE. endobj ), Stay up to date with the latest Digital Ants Network (DAN) versions in our channel, All of these features are available at no cost to you. And besides, all of these sites, they're just an illusion. They spend billions of dollars every year lobbying, lobbying, to get what they want. Famous Quotes by George Carlin about Politics. CHALLENGES! But in war times they quickly become, our brave young fighting men and women stationed half way around the world in places whose name's they(POLITICIANS) can't pronounce, wandering if they will ever see their loved ones again. Not in the abstract they don't. Cause Americans have a lot of trouble dealing with reality. Yeah, let's share our every thought and feeling with the entire world, because that's what we need, more information. POLITICIAN:HE HASN'T RESPONDED TO MY INITIATIVE. (Yes, I know, the USS America is a humongous, gargantuan behemoth, and the rudder very, very, very small, but we can still make it sloooowly turn to a certain general heading if we all pile our [intelligent] votes in the wheelhouse. https://ad.style/. Everyone's taking pictures of themselves, all the time. Regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comedians of all time, he was dubbed "the dean of counterculture comedians". From the late 1980s, Carlin's routines focused on sociocultural criticism of American society. He often commented on contemporary political issues in the United States and satirized the excesses of American culture. They're not your friends. By the way, its the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. George Carlin's acerbic wit and profound societal insights were a one time cultural phenomenon. Nobody seems to care. All day long beating you over the head in their media telling you what to believe, what to think and what to buy. It covers the most famous 'rant' part of the speech. 203 0 obj It's like we're living in this weird dystopian future where everyone is constantly monitoring each other, waiting for the opportunity to pounce. Where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans ready to step in and save the nation and lead the way? <>stream <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[308.9844 674.625 540.0 693.375]/StructParent 1/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. Thats a nice campaign slogan for somebody: The public sucks! 194 0 obj Everyone experiences pain, of course. The late George Carlin was a genius with words, a deft dasher of conventional logic, and a master observer (and master-baiter!) startxref But the POLITICIANS, god bless them or something like that, they're are at their most entertaining when they're are in trouble. It's like the Wild West of the internet, but with more trolls. endobj But, he is wrong here. "Forget the politicians. THOU SHALT NOT TAKE THE NAME OF THE LORD THY GOD IN. [wptabtitle]@Shoq[/wptabtitle][wptabcontent][twitter-feed username=shoq mode=feed id=323150247956193281][/wptabcontent] It is a crisis of confidence', Crisis of Confidence speech - 1979 , Jon Stewart: "They responded in five seconds", 9-11 first responders, Address to Congress - 2019, Jacinda Ardern: 'They were New Zealanders. You know what they want? But here's the thing: social media isn't real life. "We're so self-important. Ill let Carlin tell you what he thinks. Comedian George Carlin, who died Sunday of heart failure at 71, was known for an act featuring "seven dirty words" that became the focus of a Supreme Court case. Nobody cares. Beep Boop, this was generated by by ChatGPT. According to Carlin, religion is one of humanitys greatest swindles and created nothing but lies, conflict, and suffering. He was a spiritual atheist as an adult. You know, that thing that's supposed to make us more connected and informed, but really just turns us into a bunch of self-obsessed, attention-seeking, validation-craving zombies. The PEOPLE are fucked. You have no right to complain. <<76B7883B53B3B2110A00D082ECFCFC7F>]/Prev 777933>> We're all becoming like Goldfish, swimming around in our own little bowls, looking at the world through a curved piece of glass. 193 0 obj Here's a transcript of a segment where he talks about it: "Social media, what a crock of shit that is. Global Search Search In. Mr. GEORGE CARLIN: Here's another slogan you run into all the time "God Bless America." Once again, respectfully I say to myself what the (beep) does that mean. THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. He spoke about his book "Brain Droppings" and answered questions submitted by the audience. Moses could have carried them down the hill in his pocket. Londons Heathrow Airport, November 7, 2018. As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you, the only difference is, when I get finished masturbating, Im going to have a little something to show for it folks. Reading the text, it sounds like a reasonably serious essaywell, sort of. Results like these do not belong on the rsum of a Supreme Being. (LAUGHS). Carlin was noted for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. Theyll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! 187 0 obj Yes, all the words are quite impolite. George Carlin. People just spewing their uninformed opinions and insults at each other. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? Everybody complains about politicians. As I say, they're my work, they're my . They don't fall out of the sky. Oh, I gotta share this with my friends, you know what you should do? As a lifelong stand-up comedian, Carlin had a lot of opportunities to speak his mindand religion and politics were two of his favorite subjects. They own all the important land. And we've only been engaged in heavy industry for a little over two hundred years. Quick Guide. Yeah the public sucks. Retweets do count. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. However, he calls himself an apatheist (meaning that he's an atheist who doesn't care about the topic). His parents split up when he was an infant because his . The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! They dont care about you at all at all AT ALL. All rights reserved. It covers the most famous 'rant' part of the speech. % What a great idea. So maybe maybe MAYBE, its not the politicians who suck. See they don't DECIDE; they DETERMINE. But he wasn't always a . POLITICIAN:SERVING THE NATION. _S@bZ&j{|pQGB0qw_rm+eUr!:J9d j9mLJRL Q3PUn\#MuRJ\ *B6B6x George has been quoted as calling this his favourite HBO special of them all due to its continuous flow-on nature and high standard of writing. Such as the PROCESS: POLITICIAN:WE HAVE TO MOVE THE PROCESS FORWARD SO WE CAN IMPLEMENT THE PROVISIONS OF THE INITIATIVE IN ORDER TO MEET THESE CHALLENGES. A lot of that goes on: QUESTION:SENATOR, HAVE YOU SOLVED THAT PROBLEM?POLITICIAN:WELL, WE'RE MOVING FORWARD ON THAT. Michael Cooney was a speechwriter for @, George Carlin: 'Politicians don't actually say things, they INDICATE them', National Press Club - 1999. http://www.ravendevelopers.com/blog/2013/0 Bernie Sanders: 'So the next time you hear me attacked as a socialist, remember this', Georgetown University - 2015, Jimmy Carter: 'The threat is nearly invisible in ordinary ways. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(digitalcommons@montclair.edu)/Rect[400.0562 72.3516 527.5898 82.8984]/StructParent 7/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> 25l`|xs[e>L;}_}S +Fn-RWErk^7=fa,|~'RsiYK@"4W/:iVDrZWV)^:i\9KnwmVYi5v b^mfYN.[ T*gvIc"f=di^fE)SGO And then, maybe, put down your phone and go have an actual conversation with someone. Friends? Carlin was known for his dark comedy and reflections on politics, religion, psychology, language and taboo subjects.
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